The Den! Is Back! ...and other great things

Last weekend we went back to campus to watch the Purdue-Notre Dame game amongst a friendly crowd. None of us had been back in a few years, so we pretty much played tourist all day. It was basically awesome. Words fail to do it justice, so I will just give you pictures.

(Oohh, except I don't have any pictures of the adorable 21-year-old shirtless fraternity boys we played with. Yup, shirtless and adorable.  And I still chose not to become a fairy godcougar. So let's all take a moment to appreciate my willpower, and then we can move right along to the pictures.)

Without further ado...

Smoochin' Marty J.

Boom Boom Phi Mu!
PS It was recruitment. There was actual Boom Boom-ing going on!

Carey Quad + Ross-Ade = Boiler Up!

Mackey Arena. Home of the Baby Boilers. (Call me, Chris Kramer!)

Purdue University! Home of this super fancy new sign!

Neil Armstrong is a badass. Thus, this building is aptly named.
PS - There's a book about him called First Man. It is fascinating. Read it.

This is John. See John run.

Run John, run!

See the fountain. See John get wet.

This is Mere. See Mere look confused.

See John and Mere be freaking adorable!

Hovde Hall? Maybe? (Maybe not??)

A little slice of awesome.

This picture just screams "Hipstamatic"

Don't walk under the bell tower! You won't graduate!
You already did? Too bad. They will take that shit back!

Hmm, I didn't hear any roaring...curious.

John claimed the water was supposed to be super-clean. We requested he test this theory.

This is what college is supposed to look like.

But seriously. Did I mention? The Den! Is Back!

Pink lemonade + Jimmy Johns = yum.
(Yes, I took a picture of my Den Pop. Shut up.)

See John and Mere be adorable. At Harry's.

Dear Tom, pretty sure you have a Purdue shirt you should be wearing!

Pour one out for our dearly departed friend, Stacks.

Like it's 1999

For reals.

I found my journal from sophomore/junior year of high school. Literally - 1999.

It is awesome.

And if you are lucky, I just might share it with you...

Bored now.

So I know that I should have more to say now that the Bar is over. But I mean, it's not like I have a job or anything to do with my life. My parents are out of town, which means the past week I have spent laying out, watering the flowers, watching trash TV and hanging out with the dogs. 

And don't be jealous, it is actually not nearly as awesome as it may sound...I can practically hear my brain cells gasping for life.

Although, I am taking advantage of being home alone - not by throwing parties, but by taking this time to completely reorganize my parents lives. They are so going to hate me when they come home and cannot find anything. (Because I threw it all away!)

My first task was the freezer. It was completely full, like literally could not fit a single thing in there full. Check it out now...

Obviously I kept the ice cream!

Post-Bar Reading List

Don't look too closely or you will notice that half of these are YA novels!

I need to get a hobby*

So you know that I am like super-yuppie, right? Except when it comes to my nails? (And boys...but that is so not the point right now!)

Yeah, the nails...it's getting out of control. And I've taken to photographing the extra-outrageous manicures, just so you can all appreciate the new levels of ridiculousness I have reached this summer. 

Enjoy! :) 

I mean, this color? Come on!

Green glitter in honor of Crabbie Open

Yes, there are stars and red glitter on my blue nails. Patriotism, yall!

Ok so these are a little bling-tastic, even for me, but it was a holiday!

You know how I love to mix metallics.

Funny story, I had a gymnastics leotard that looked just like this. When I was 6. 

The 80s were awesome.

This is my current manicure, and I cannot stop staring at my nails. L-O-V-E.

Although, now that I think about it they kind of look like a figure skating costume. Hmm.

*Team Bethenny. That is all.

Spoke too soon...

Of course, the minute I finish bitching about being at home...

My Mom sends me this picture - they are celebrating A's half-birthday (6 1/2!) with Arni's pizza and cupcakes. And then A calls to tell me "I love you and goodnight" (and that he is winning at Uno, of course).

Three comments:

1. Silly Bandz...taking over the world. He usually wears 40 - literally.

2. His shirt says "Western White House Crawford, TX" Awesome.

3. He has this adorable "face dimple" under his eye when he smiles, 

it makes me smile every time I see it. 

Peace and Quiet - and old pictures!

I retreated to B-town today to sequester myself for a few days in hopes of avoiding the distractions that come with being at home. (Sure, Mom, of course I can let the painters in and watch the dogs and have a family dinner, not like I have anything else on my agenda...oh wait.)

It is blissfully quiet here. I can hear myself think and everything. (Not that the sound of wheels spinning is too encouraging)

I needed a study break, so I'm posting some awesome pictures I found from a post-grad return trip to Harry's!

First, a great picture of M&J to prove that they are actually adorably photogenic: 

Told you so!

Because, having said that, we sure do manage to take some ridiculous pictures when we get together:

Well hello, Mystery Hand. Peace be with you too!

22 oz. Corona = L-O, L-O

Well hello to you too, Mystery Male Body.

(M, am I correct in thinking this one belonged to your sister at the time? 

Because he certainly wasn't mine!)

And if this picture wasn't enough proof, let it be noted: the Green Dragon is nobody's friend.

And finally: just when M returns to being photogenic, I decide to go all paparazzi.

Tangent:  That guy in the background? We've been tailgating together since about age 6.

Yet I never noticed him until right now. Oops!

My new haircut*

For all you impatient ones -

*For those of you who don't recognize the reference, please remove the the rock under which you live and YouTube it. And to think - it was pre-Jersey Shore!

A letter to my hair

Dear long and brown,

It's been fun. But I'm in the midst of a quarter-life crisis, and thus it is time for you to go.

You're being replaced by short and blonde.

Catch ya later,
B

So long!

Astrology sucks

So I get my horoscope emailed to me every morning. Yes, I know it's cheesy. But sometimes they are eerily accurate. I read them to my friends who also happen to be Geminis. Delightful fun.

This is what my horoscope told me today...

"You may be locked into the wrong career path." 

Wow. Really? Considering that I'm locked into taking a bar exam - that I am totally going to fail - in 25 days? On top of graduating with tons of debt, no job and living with my parents? Not exactly the encouragement a girl needs right now.

Horoscopes?

NOT DELIGHTFUL. NOT FUN.

Can I quit being a Gemini now??

Disco Fever

Yeah, so I may have literally dipped my fingernails in glitter tonight.

(Yes, on purpose.)

Turns out? Awesome!

Have I mentioned how little fun it is to study for the bar? These are the distractions, people!

score one for my dignity

I was just starting to miss my Perez Hilton fix when I saw this.

And now my satisfaction at giving it up has been reaffirmed.

Posting upskirt pictures of a minor? Really?

It may be kind of arbitrary to get more indignant about this than other crap he's posted, but then again...

He's finally crossed the line from "tacky" to "potentially felonious."

What an idiot.

Ok...NOW I feel old.

I turned 27 two weeks ago.

My friends have either hit 28 or are rapidly approaching.

My brother turned 30 yesterday.

My high school reunion is next year.

None of this made me feel old.

Until now.


I just realized...

My first date with the high school boyfriend? Was exactly TEN years ago.

Where did it go?

French (Blue) Tips

Why haven't I tried this sooner!?

I sense the beginnings of a very fun summer for B's nails!

A Birthday to Remember

Once upon a time, can't believe how long ago, I had a very short-lived affair. A few shacks, a couple dates, a ride home from Purdue - really nothing to write home about. 

Except that the affair was with one of my brother's best friends. 

(Brother may have won the battle in high school with the "overprotective big bro" thing he had going on, but once I turned 21...all bets were off.)

So yeah, I ran into Friend at the bars one night - he was at a bachelor party that Brother had (conveniently for me) bailed out on, and I was just out of college and trying not to be "Brother's little sister" anymore. 

But Brother was still very much in overprotective mode. Like, "bodily harm would result" levels of overprotective. Therefore, we kept it very, very secret. 

(Which, naturally, was half the fun.) 

I'll spare you the details. Like I said, short-lived affair. I moved to DC, he called sporadically, we rekindled a few times when I was home visiting. End of fun, but not very exciting story?

Last time I saw him was at Brother's wedding - three years ago. He was there with a date but texting me from the next table, flirting with the idea of a rendezvous behind the wedding tent. (In a moment of rare good judgment, I opted out)

The sporadic phone calls continued all through law school - "Hey B, it's me - I'm in town, we should get together." I carefully avoided them all. (Woot, more good judgment!)

Because, wait for it, by this time Wedding Date was his GF. And they were living together. And she had become BFFs with Brother and his wife...  

Of course she had.

You may ask: where am I going with this?

Guess who's hosting Brother's birthday party tomorrow? That would be me. 

Guess who will be attending? That would be Friend. 

Guess who else? That would be Wedding Date/GF/BFF

This oughta be good.

(And for the cherry on top: Have I mentioned that the guest of honor is in AA? And thus I will be navigating this minefield without a cocktail in hand?)

So really, by "good", I mean "potentially never-before-reached levels of uncomfortable"

The Tooth Fairy Returns

Graduating from law school and moving back home was not exactly in my game plan. But what can you do? And so far it's nice to spend time with my family - especially the nephews.

I'm starting to get why everyone's always talking about "oohh it just goes so fast." Because hell, last I checked J was pretty much just laid there - and cried a lot. Now he runs around - and yells random syllables. And A? I'm pretty sure his first birthday was yesterday but somehow he's in first grade. SLOW DOWN!

Part of that whole growing up business - 

The first baby tooth fell out. 

Tooth Fairy left him $5. Sweet deal!

And he's playing baseball now - in the same league I grew up playing in. 

Like, I remember making daisy chains in the outfield and thinking that playing pitcher's helper was the coolest thing ever. 

Twenty years later (TWENTY! 2-0!)...I show up on Saturday mornings for his games and check out the hot dads. 

(Of course none of them are single, and even if they were...playing stepmommy is not in the cards for me. But it makes the game go so much faster to look! Also worth noting: I'm pretty sure baseball dads weren't always this cute. My mom, however, says they totally were.)

But anyhow, back to A...he's pretty sure he's going to get drafted by the Cubs next year. To which I repeat: SLOW DOWN! And, also, learn how to catch a fly ball first.

Listening intensely to his third base coach.

Whose only advice is this - 

Run A, run!

Luckily he still has adorable little boy moments too. 

Yes, Cosmo. You're cute too.

Actual Facebook Message

Subject: potentially uncouth question

are you still in bloomington? any interest in a covert rendezvous?

My question is this...

How, pray tell, does one go about responding to such a message?

Because I find myself torn between "kind of hilarious" and "appalled and slightly offended."

Consider the following factors in forming your answer:

1. The uncouth questioner is a dude in my law school class.
2. Yes, I may have hooked up with him. 
3. Twice.
4. It was nearly two years ago.
5. I haven't so much as spoken to him in about as long.
6. We're not even Facebook friends.
7. Last I was told, he has a girlfriend.
8. Who would presumably find the uncouthness of his question more "definite" than "potential"

If your answer is either "ignore him" or "make fun of him for being desperate," then I tend to agree!

However, if you have another answer, please share - with analysis referencing the above factors, if possible :)

*Silver lining: at least he's not married!

What [little remaining] dignity I possess is applauding

It's official.

I have unsubscribed Perez Hilton from my Google Reader.

(Don't worry, celebrity gossip updates will continue courtesy of Lainey!)

Hooked on Mnemonics

So my Criminal Procedure exam is tomorrow. And if I've learned anything this semester it is that a four-hour, partial-closed-book exam should almost certainly constitute an 8th Amendment violation. 

(Hey, I gotta make a few more lame law school jokes while I have the chance, ok? Groan at will.)

Anyway, the closed book portion involves memorizing the holdings of 100-odd cases. Which, basically, looks like this:

Say hi to my pretty flash cards!

Silver lining: in the hours of sitting at home reading aloud to myself, I have come up with some pretty awesome mnemonic devices. 

And - [tangent] - please tell me that I am not the only one who cannot hear the word mnemonic without thinking of that Full House episode? "Double the c-, double the s- and you'll always have success!" [end tangent]

So now I will share some of favorites and call it studying...

• Oliver v. US: open fields doctrine - Oliver Winery, acres of grape fields!
• Michigan v. Summers: officer can make a stop with an articulable basis for suspicion - umm, I'm pretty sure Buffy Summers [the Vampire Slayer] was always doing something suspicious!
• Kyllo v. US: federal agents busted a grow house  - kilos of drugs, anyone?
• Ybarra v. Illinois: the search took place in a bar, it's like a gimme. 
• California v. Carney: automobile exception applies to motor homes - can't you just picture the RV full of carnies and clowns driving down the PCH?
• And another case deals with overnight guests and shall remain nameless... as it totally shares the name of a recent overnight guest of my own. I'm pretty sure I'm not going to forget that one!

Can you tell someone is ready for exams to be over?? Someone named "me"?

See y'all on the other side...three days left!

My finals diet

Starburst

Skittles

Smarties*

Nerds**

Gobstoppers

Gummy worms

Sour gummy worms

...and chocolate. For good measure.

Insert appropriate How I Met Your Mother quote here:

"Jellybeans, fluffernutter, gummi bears, gingersnaps. This is a grocery list."

"For who? A witch building a house in the forest? 

... 

"Sugar helps me study..."

It's funny because it's true. (Maybe you had to be there?)


*Hello, I thought they might help me learn income tax.
**Too easy?

Isn't it ironic? Don't you think?

Oil spill feared after rig sinks.

And in unrelated news...

Happy Earth Day!

Your move, Mrs. Vitolins...

So when I was a sophomore in high school, my Zoology teacher insisted that it was impossible for me to have a Pileated Woodpecker in my backyard.

For those of you who didn't have to memorize 100 birds and take an exam on them - THE WEEK BEFORE SPRING BREAK - I refer you to Wikipedia. (For those of you too lazy to click on the link I have helpfully provided, suffice it to say that it's a giant freaking bird that pecks wood and looks vaguely prehistoric.)

Impossible, eh? Well, it may have taken 12 years to prove my case, but damn if I don't have photographic evidence that it IS in fact possible for me to have a Pileated Woodpecker in my backyard:

Picture...thousand words. *

What now, Vitolins? What now?


*Because we all know pictures don't lie. Unless, of course, one is skilled in Photoshop. But seriously, like I have the time or inclination to become proficient in photo editing simply to prove a decade-old point to a teacher who doesn't remember this conversation and doesn't read this blog? Yeah, even I haven't reached that level.

Yes, there's snow in the picture. I may have misplaced my camera for, oh, six months or so. Don't worry about it. Also - expect more highly unseasonal pictures now that it has been recovered.

So much better than the library

Somehow being in the sun makes reading hundreds of pages of source material (slightly) less painless.